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Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Does your significant other come to the park and watch the kids? Does s/he skate themselves? Or are they just happy that you're out getting exercise instead of getting drunk? Ever suffered Skaters Spouse Syndrome? Sit down, grab a frosty beverage and tell us all about it

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Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Postby leebryan » Fri Jun 28, 2013 5:20 am

SSS is a phenomenon I noticed back in the 80's which I think still exists to this day. It appears as many variants, but the basic theme goes something like this.

Skater skates, and practices incessantly, becomes good and starts interacting further afield with other skaters. In the process of this, they get exposed to more potential love partners by association and just plain old geography. Skating seems to hold an allure for some of these, who then become attracted to the skater, and then want to be a part of their life. Romance ensues.

THEN... As romance progresses, the new partner starts to resent the amount of travel, time and energy the skater wants and needs to spend on skating to maintain and progress their skating level. They try many strategies to alleviate this, one of the main ones being non skating partners hanging out at spots while the skater skates. This rarely goes well. If the partner is chill enough, the romance continues. If they can't adapt to this change in lifestyle, they fall by the wayside. Or, if the relationship seems to be strong, the skater sometimes ramps back on the amount of skating they do.

Does this still exist? The majority of responses I got from the survey on relationships had some variant of the old "Anyone getting with me needs to understand that I'm a skater and I'm going to skate. I NEED to skate. If they don't - they don't stick around". How common is that? Discuss :-)
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Re: Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Postby Bri » Tue Jul 02, 2013 4:27 pm

My wife is pretty encouraging as it happens, ( just have to vaugely justify extra bits arriving in the post now & again) so no real problems, boring eh! :lol:
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Re: Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Postby Oldschoolsteve » Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:12 pm

About the same as bri,my wife is really supportive,and my kids too
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Re: Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Postby Bri » Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:34 pm

My kids just think I'm a bit bonkers, about right actually, but my son has started skating with me now sometimes when he can get away from his bedroom elcetronics :D
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Re: Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Postby RaDDaD » Wed Jul 03, 2013 8:45 pm

I am convinced my wife believes I am a bit crazy, especially if I come home with bloody elbows or knees or worse yet a messed up chin!! We met in the 90s after my years of skating street and vert were pretty much over --- she has always seen me as a skater as I have always been drawn to the skating lifestyle (clothing, image, music) even though for many years I didn't even step on a board --- at least not with any consistency. Now being in my 40s and getting back on the board with quite a bit of consistency and lots of money spent on "collecting" and creating.. And, though she sees me as a bit crazy --- It does keep me in shape, it is also great for my mental health as it makes me extremely happy which in turn is great for home life!! She may not always agree with it -- me and my little wooden toy (or MANY wooden toys as it were) but she has really come around --- as she sees how much joy it brings to my life!

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Re: Skaters Spouse Syndrome

Postby leebryan » Sat Jul 06, 2013 6:50 am

I've had a checkered history with relationships and skating, making some bad choices along the way which affected me way deeper than I ever thought they could have. At my peak, I got married in a whirlwind romance, which effectively ended my budding pro career. She was attracted to the glamor, but couldn't deal with the practice and time it took to progress and stay at the top of my game. Of course I wanted to make it work, so I ramped back on the skating. Biggest mistake I ever made. Looking back, the one thing I should have done was to put skating front and center, and be unyielding about how important it was to my life. I think that one thing will weed out the potential partners who will suck your commitment dry and make you fizzle out. Stick to your guns, young 'uns! Don't deny your soul, but understand it deeply and find someone who not only understands that, but loves it about you and knows its not only not going away, it's going to be a consistent reality for ever. I think that's the path to true happiness in a skating relationship. And Bri - you got a good 'un there. :D
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